Obsession | notes.eatonphil.com

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2024-08-31 16:00:10

In your professional and personal life, I don't believe there is a stronger motivation than having something in mind and the desire to do it. Yet the natural way to deal with a desire to do something is to justify why it's not possible.

Our official mentors, our managers, through a combination of well-intentioned defeatism and well-intentioned lack of accomplishment themselves, among other things, are often unable to process big goals or guide you toward them.

I've been one of these managers myself. In fact I have, to my immense regret, tried too often to convince people to do what is practical rather than what they want to do. Or to do what I judged they were capable of doing rather than what they wanted to do.

In the best cases, my listener had the self-confidence to ignore me. They did what they wanted to do anyway. In the worst case, again to my deep regret, I've been a well-intentioned part of derailing someone's career for years.

So I don't want to convince anyone of anything anymore. If I start trying to convince someone by accident, I try to catch myself. I try to avoid sentences like "I think you should …". Instead "Here is something that's worked for me: …" or "Here is what I've heard works well for other people: …".