If I had to take a swing in the dark here I would guess that there are probably a lot of things you want to accomplish in your life. If I was betting money on it I'd say you haven't accomplished many of them.
It’s incredibly easy and relieving to defer the entirety of your personality, flaws, self esteem & motivation onto vague unsolvable causes. I’ve done it quite a bit myself and I know you've all done it too.
After all, if you've been a certain way since you can remember, then maybe you should just assume it’s who you are right? Objectively it's probably a mixture of the environment you grew up in, genetics / brain chemistry and all that fun stuff right? You've been a procrastinator since birth, you've felt socially awkward since kindergarten. These things don’t change, at least not for you. It’s just who you are, and you'll learn to work around it. No point in addressing something that's embedded into your DNA.
Before you click off this page thinking I’m about to launch into a Tony Robbins style self help guide (I kind of am), please just entertain me with the following.