Do not touch that computer. Not even while wearing gloves. It is a biohazard
On Call: Dirt File It's a holiday Friday in much of the Reg-reading world so On Call is departing from its usual format of a single story to instead bring you more tales from our Dirt File: your stories of mud, crud, dust, fust, and other foul substances that make fixing hardware so very fun.
"One day a customer unit comes in and you could literally smell the thing at over 50 paces," he told On Call, explaining that the Mac in question bore the unmistakable odor of cigarettes.
"As soon as I took the side cover off, the smell became several orders of magnitude worse," Bill told On Call. Opening the machine also revealed that "literally the entire inside of the case was coated in a thick layer of slime."
"'Thick layer of slime' is not hyperbolic or my taking any kind of literary license, it is a simple statement of fact," he wrote. "It was as if Slimer from Ghostbusters had flown through the computer a few times and left the entire inside coated. There were literally tar-cicles (I assume that's what it was) on the fan blades a good couple millimeters long, you could see what looked like water droplets, only made of tar, frozen in time on the walls, and dust and other miscellaneous debris had been mixed into the various layers of slime as it was laid down."
"Just send it back as a biohazard," Bill was told, whereupon photos were taken to prove that the machine was dangerous to his health.
