I am not ambitious enough

This first time I had this thought was in November of last year, a few weeks after I started using Cursor. I managed to code into existence several old ideas I had had, ones that would never have seen the light of day without AI. I noticed that I need to adjust my sense of what is possible quite drastically. I got so excited, and suddently felt like I had so much more capacity, that I even started this blog and wrote my first post. The lesson back then was clear:

In the post I say "... and my ambition is only increasing". It has only been 10 months since then... The velocity in the AI space is staggering. I can't keep up. When I feel overwhelmed by all the progress I can feel cynicism try to creep in, hoping to keep me from feeling overwhelmed by attaching to ideas that surely we're hitting this or that scaling wall, and the current architecture won't bring us any further, and the models won't be able to generate better data to train their own future iterations, that would be crazy. I try to shake off the cynicism, and stick to my lesson.

I wanted Conway's game of life in the footer of this website, and I wanted it to be interactive. It was on the blog an hour later *. It doesn't come naturally to me, this feeling of... what? abundance? Is abundance the right word for when I don't need to hold ideas back because what once took weeks now takes hours? * Perhaps it is. I used to have an abundance of ideas, and not enough of some combination of confidence/ambition/desire to bring ideas to life. I've been running this recallibration on myself now for 10 months, and when I get an idea, I still go through something like a reverse Gartner hype cycle of 'Ugh but I'll need to pick a tech, and learn it, and... and... Oh wait no I can just ask for it and it will appear magically in front of my eyes. I forgot.'. I still need to internalize the lesson more.

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