2nd State of the Onion

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2023-03-17 07:30:03

Thank you very much. I like you too. Especially when you like me like you're liking me right now. Thank you for liking me. And thank you for your applause. I confess, I'm human--I like applause. I like attention.

Speaking of attention, how many of you saw the August 10 issue of Forbes magazine? Wait, my daughter made me something. <dons orange glasses>

Anyway, I like applause. So let's talk about applause. Applause is primarily an auditory or audio symbol. Like any symbol, it seems kind of silly if you think about it too much. I mean, come on, why in the world are you sitting there banging your hands together? Your palms probably hurt now. And you're gonna get arthritis when your older. Clapping is silly.

However, it makes a great noise, doesn't it? That's the point. Other people hear you clapping and they may decide to clap too. It's something a crowd can agree on. It is, in short, a symbol that ties a community together. Most symbols work that way.

I love auditory symbols. If you've ever visited my house, you know that my house is full of them. So last year I filled my keynote speech with all sorts of weird sounds. The sound-oriented folks in the crowd loved it, but the visually-oriented folks felt a bit left out. So this year I've decided to concentrate on the sights rather than the sounds. Sort of a WYSIWYG. What you see is what you get. Maybe next year we'll do smellovision. We can compare the smell of a camel to the smell of a rose.

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