I only ever cheated in gym class, and for the mile run specifically; we were graded on improvement and I knew I wouldn’t be able to improve, so

A lap around the Maschsee

submited by

Style Pass

2024-09-28 19:00:06

I only ever cheated in gym class, and for the mile run specifically; we were graded on improvement and I knew I wouldn’t be able to improve, so I intentionally ran slow at the start of the year. Back then I wasn’t aware of any allergic reaction I had to gluten; all I knew when running was that it hurt all over my body when I did it – and it did, it hurt really bad.

Fast forward some years and running just wasn’t part of my routine. I grew a bit emotional about running, worried about the physical pain, worried about the shame for not pushing through mentally when it hurt.

In due course I went through my own journey eliminating gluten from my diet and the source of my pain disappeared. Surprisingly it wasn’t just my lazy head not wanting to put in the effort. Still, even today, running revives a lot of the emotional response I built up over time. It was no longer physically as painful to run, but I got headaches thinking about it.

In January 2022 that changed, finally. I don’t know why. Wish I could say I decided to push through the pain and the effort paid off but actually some switch unbeknown to me flipped and I started building a routine. Something similar happened in April 2018 when, without any work on my part, most of the sleep issues I grew up with disappeared. It’s not like everything was magically perfect, but things did feel magically unlocked.