We do sympathize with the Space Force. Seriously. They're not taken very seriously, and it can't be easy to watch pretty much every other branch of the US military be immortalized in glory and splendor in an endless stream of shows and films while you get one dud of a Steve Carrell series that just makes fun of you.
It's difficult, however, to retain sympathy when the Space Force continuously opts to embarrass itself. Which brings us to the Space Force's "official" theme song, "Semper Supra," newly unveiled for all to — well, if not "enjoy," certainly "listen to." Is it a banger, you ask? Sadly, the answer is no.
First and foremost, we must address the instrumental vibe. While we understand the desire to go for a classic, woodwind-heavy theme, this isn't the 1700s anymore, people! George Washington isn't the target audience here, and he certainly didn't cross the Delaware so we could stay creatively stuck in Revolutionary times.
To that point: no hate to woodwinds. We're a pro-orchestra publication. But this specific instrumental direction has a Barney-cleanup-song-but-for-kids-born-in-1774 feel. Not the move.