Listening is not what you think

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2023-01-24 22:00:10

I tend to feel that people don't get properly listened at. Everybody's craving for attention, on social media or just in real life. What so complex about it ? Listening is not hearing, it requires actual efforts. The effort of taking yourself out of the picture. The effort to make some space to welcome otherness. This ain't easy. Particularly if you do not share obvious interest with the speaker. But most of the times, there are solid benefits: refraining from talking gives you the opportunity to unveil what's driving people, from their hearts and minds (provided that you show appreciation to what they are sharing with you). And that is pretty cool, as you could discover new areas of interest, valuable insights or better understand arguments supporting ideas you don't adhere to. But also, you may help someone clearing his soul from dreadful feelings. Because before being able to welcome advices, one often needs to clarify what one needs. And the most straightforward way to do it, for me at least, has always been to talk through it, out loud. Easy! Why can't I just speak to myself? I also do it from time to time to be honest, mainly when debugging stuff actually, but I feel that I am missing something: talking to someone helps you share the load, because by actively listening, one offers you a space to drop it. Be it for an hour or a minute, laying down your burden helps you appreciate the distance traveled. And that's all you need sometimes to resume your journey. Advices should only come after in my opinion. By the way, I am definitely not the best at this, everyone can improve 😊

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